Well, folks, it was fun while it lasted, but Fishtown has officially jumped the shark.
It started off well enough, with great beer bars and best-in-the-country pizza places popping up on every corner of the neighborhood. Things even got better when Live Nation
turned a pile of a corner into a beautiful concert venue, even filling it in with a comedy club and a restaurant. But now things have gone too far—we’re getting a generic Goose Island pub in the area
that already boasts Philly’s favorite Yards
and two other locals going in, and now it’s been announced that we’re getting a bowling alley (yay?) with a—wait for it—a flair bar
Yes, a flair bar. Because apparently a profession that peaked in 1988 is still a viable business plan.
This may seem like the corny gimmick you would expect to see impressing 19-year-olds with fake IDs down the street at the Bamboo Bar, but no, this will be a new concept at a brand new establishment. The cleverly named Flair Street
will also partner with the equally cleverly named Burger & Beer Joint inside Revolutions
, the brand new bowling alley going into this increasingly watered down, generic entertainment complex.
And while Burger & Beer Joint is boasting wall-to-wall TVs (probably showing that sweet A-Ha video), Flair Street will bring in the world’s premier flair bartenders for national competitions. Do you hear that, Fishtown?! You’ll be the center of the world stage! It’ll be for a very specific and sad subset of the population, but damnit, you’ll be right in the limelight.
Fishtown, it was fun while it lasted. Hopefully the new bar from the Johnny Brenda’s crew can keep this growing, pulsing evil entertainment empire in check and not let it spread its slimy tentacles through too much of the neighborhood. Or maybe you’ll just be too busy standing in line at Beddia to even care.
, Terrible Ideas
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