Spirit Cruises January 2023 Leaderboard

Things No One Asked For: The Hydrasatch, A Satchel Bag That Holds Mixed Drinks

by Ryan Hudak on Jul 18, 2017 in Culture

There’s more good news out there for all those people who can’t possibly be without alcohol at their sides at all times—the HydraSatch is now available for all your outdoor activities.  Much like commercials for Valtrex will get you back out into the woods or on your kayak without your herpes flaring up, the HydraSatch will get you to all your outdoor activities without your pesky soberness getting in the way.

In the product’s promotional video, posted ahead of their Kickstarter going live, the HydraSatch comes off as an outdoorsy, yet fancy, way to always keep alcohol no more than three feet from your mouth.  Because, you see, this isn’t just to hold beer or wine like some kind of garbage person.  The HydraSatch is meant to hold your favorite cocktail—something you put time into, something that takes care to mix and complete.  And then you put it in a purse and wear it for a few hours.
 

The HydraSatch looks like the lamest satchel possible, which won’t do you any favors when you slam into a tree because you went hurtling down a mountain on your snowboard while drunk on a purse full of gin and tonic.  The video also hints that you could take it into a sporting event, with a shot of AT&T Park in San Francisco, followed by a sign that says “no alcohol beyond this point” and someone walking through unimpeded with their HydraSatch on.  Because security at a sporting event definitely won’t check your bag—especially one with a hose coming out of it.

As much fun as it might sound to get sauced on a hike in the middle of the woods or to try to see how much your 5K will benefit from booze, you should probably stick to drinking your alcohol from a glass or mug like a functioning adult member of society.  And if the thought of having to wait until you’re done with your walk around town to drink gives you the sweats, keep an eye out for their Kickstarter, and be sure to top off the drink in your hand right now.  It’s getting dangerously low.

Photo via HydraSatch on Facebook

Recent Articles
spacer

Feedback

How are we doing? Tell us what you like or don't like and how we can improve. We would love to hear your thoughts!

*Name:
*E-mail:
*Suggestions:
 
Rittenhouse Goes Car-Free Every Sunday in September: Here are the Best Bars to Hit

Rittenhouse Goes Car-Free Every Sunday in September: Here are the Best Bars to Hit

Center City District will close the streets allowing pedestrians to enjoy outdoor seating, music, and activiti...read more ›

by Michelle Cryder Sep 6, 2024
Best Cocktail Bars at the Jersey Shore

Best Cocktail Bars at the Jersey Shore

We've rounded up all of the must-stop spots for sipping spirits by the beach, whether your vibe is dark and sexy or vibrant and divey....read more ›

by Drink Philly Aug 26, 2024
The Drink Nation Presents: The Home Bar Project

The Drink Nation Presents: The Home Bar Project

Have you ever dreamed of having an amazing home bar, filled with bottles you actually use and the tools you need to execute a fine crafted cocktail? E...read more ›

by The Drink Nation Nov 14, 2014
SPONSORED
Spirit Cruises January 2023 Desktop Bottom Rectangle 1
Behind the Bar: Jillian Moore of My Loup

Behind the Bar: Jillian Moore of My Loup

This time on Behind the Bar, we interview bartender and bar manager Jillian Moore of My Loup. We chat with her about her cocktail menu, the effects of...read more ›

by Drink Philly May 13, 2024
Oltremare: Inside Look at their Amalfi Coast Inspired Cocktails

Oltremare: Inside Look at their Amalfi Coast Inspired Cocktails

Oltremare is the newest endeavor by Chef Townsend Wentz, located at 2121 Walnut Street, near Rittenhouse Square...read more ›

by Drink Philly Apr 22, 2024
Best Bars for Outdoor Drinking in Philadelphia, 2024

Best Bars for Outdoor Drinking in Philadelphia, 2024

We've got your definitive list of where to drink outside in Philadelphia...read more ›

by Drink Philly Apr 9, 2024
Philadelphia Distilling Launching Secret Pop-Up Cocktail Garden for Earth Day, April 11-21

Philadelphia Distilling Launching Secret Pop-Up Cocktail Garden for Earth Day, April 11-21

Philadelphia Distilling is transforming their fourth floor space into a secret garden to celebrate Earth Day, ...read more ›

by Drink Philly Apr 9, 2024
Dizengoff: Inside Look at the New Reimagined Restaurant, Bar, & Cocktails

Dizengoff: Inside Look at the New Reimagined Restaurant, Bar, & Cocktails

Last year, Dizengoff and Abe Fisher decided to join forces and embark on an exciting new chapter. After closin...read more ›

by Drink Philly Mar 5, 2024
Behind the Bar: Tom Foy of Butcher Bar

Behind the Bar: Tom Foy of Butcher Bar

In this installment of Behind the Bar, we sit down with bartender Tom Foy of Butcher Bar...read more ›

by Drink Philly Feb 19, 2024
48 Record Bar: An Inside Look at an Audiophile's Listening Room & Cocktail Bar

48 Record Bar: An Inside Look at an Audiophile's Listening Room & Cocktail Bar

48 Record Bar is the newest addition to the growing Listening Room trend in Philadelphia...read more ›

by Drink Philly Feb 19, 2024
SPONSORED
Drink Nation Home Bar Project Bottom Rectangle 2
View all Articles

Sign up to get weekly drinking news, bar reviews, events and more sent directly to your inbox!

Close